Melbourne is well known for its wineries and beautiful scenery surrounding them so when we arrived to find all the wineries closed, we felt a little peeved. The saving grace was the scenery, beautiful fields and lush trees surrounded the car as we zoomed from farm to farm. My dad became similar to Cruella DeVille in the scene where she is speeding after the puppies - all red-eyed and angry. Luckily it wasn't too long before we found an open winery where I received a lesson in the pointlessness of wine tasting.

The place we stopped in was called Montalto which had funny little statues and pretty gardens. We went straight to the wine tasting. Gone are the days where I would mindlessly pour a large glass of Sauvignon Blanc and gulp it down like a peasant. I will share my new learnt wisdom with you.

Step one: man will pour wine into glass...slowly!

Step two: holding the glass by the stem, swirl the wine in small circles to release the fragrance.

Step three: stick your entire nose into your glass and pretend to smell things like pears and wood. (Top Tip: the man will chat sh*t about things he can smell, if you're not sure, just comment on the things he's mentioned.) "Mmm, lovely smell of...oak.."
Important side note: don't make things up, it is not well received!

Step four: sip it... but don't taste it???

Step five: sip again. This time feel free to comment on the flavour. Perhaps throw in an item from the smelling list like this,
"Yes! You can really taste the smoked cedar wood with just a hint of the pear oozing through." (they like it when you use words like hint and oozing!)

Step six: thank the man for the wine, spend $200 on a drink that tastes like wood because you are too polite to leave without purchasing anything and see if they offer additional tastings such as cheese or breads.

The remainder of the day was spent sightseeing, we searched for koalas in the trees but none were in sight! We visited a well-known beach that is lined with cutely decorated beach huts and almost got a parking fine because god forbid, we spent an entire two minutes on the beach without paying! One thing I learn about Australia early on is they love giving a fine! I'm pretty sure the entire contents of the Australian Treasury is made up from speeding fines alone!

In the evening we headed into the city for a cocktail. It was freezing! We found a nice spot by the river though and I sat practically on the gas heater to warm up. No one stuck their noses in the cocktails even though I reckon, it has more smell on offer with all the fruit and that in it!