I’m currently laying in the back of Kat’s Troopie (4x4 vehicle with a bed in the back) watching the most beautiful silhouette of one of the tents as the sun sets in the background. The tent has a single light on that matches the brilliant red and orange colours from the sunset. This is the first chance I’ve gotten in a few days to really appreciate my surroundings and ‘smell the roses’. It’s been an increasingly busy start to the season since we returned from our off time eight days ago. I can hear Woody’s laughter in the background and his funny impersonation of our South African boss, Paul. He’s sitting with the other two guides, Kat and Alex, as well as the maintenance guy, King, enjoying some rum and gingerale after a very frantic 14-hour work day.

The day began at 5am. Woody took a guest on a hike where they saw several new animals of which I cannot remember at this late hour. The guest, Victoria, an opera singer, is very fond of Woody as is her husband, Andrew. They were supposed to get married today, but, because of her Russian status, her Visa was denied. Upon Candice’s request, Woody took them a bottle of champagne and chocolates to celebrate their would-be wedding day. That made them really happy. They’ve offered to put us up at their flat in New York when we get back to North America. A very sweet couple!

I got up early to finish cleaning the lodge/kitchen in preparation for the health inspector which showed up at 8am. We passed the inspection with a 99% grade, the only issue being no handsoap dispenser in the kitchen. We’ve been gearing up for the arrival of Luxury Lodges of Australia to come do a 5-day video shoot here. Candice has assigned me as the assistant throughout their stay, helping set up the rooms and shot sequences. Woody was quite upset that Kat was chosen to be in one of the guiding sequences. I think her polished image made her a more suitable candidate, though Woody feels he is more deserving of the opportunity. I’m hoping that if he washes his hair, covers some of his tattoos, and wears the actual uniform instead of his interpretation of the guide uniform (equipped with ripped shorts and his now ratty hat) they will allow him to be in some shots, though we will likely not be here for the days that they are doing the guiding shoots. That’s not to say that I don’t like his image – it suits him very well and is quite endearing, but I could see how it doesn’t necessarily represent the ‘luxury’ brand.

We’ve got quite the range of guests at the moment. A couple that are in The Real Housewives of Melbourne are here with their three kids. I rode the golf cart out the pick up their luggage when they first arrived at the car-park (parking lot), a 1km walk from the lodge that all guests do on their way in. The mother, Gamble, stepped out of the rental car wearing 5 inch heels, stumbling over the rocky pathway. Her first question to me was, “Do you supply a hairdryer or shall I bring my own?” After explaining to her that we don’t have outlets in the tents, her kids began to ask immediately for the WiFi code. Breaking the news to them that there was no WiFi, no cellphone reception and certainly no air-conditioning was rather entertaining. Despite their naïve planning and lack of common sense, they are actually quite a nice bunch. Their tents are disasters to service, however, as there are clothes dispersed across every inch of the floor in the kids’ tent and every towel item is covered in fake tan and makeup residue in the adults’ tent. Thankfully, I’m not a housekeeper anymore!

We also had a pair of Chinese guests here – aunt and nephew – that were major pains in the ass. The aunt, whose only English words were thank you, was actually quite lovely, asking me to pose for photos with her during canapés and always smiling a wide smile as I passed her. But her nephew was a lazy, little snot who clearly did not do his research about where he was vacationing. He was very disrespectful to all the employees and didn’t once say thank you, demanding that we drive he and his aunt to the car-park for every guided activity and expecting private tours and room service throughout his entire stay. Paul and Candice were very close to kicking them out, but instead decided to answer to their every beckon call with hopes of a good review, which we did not receive.

For every irrational and frustrating guest we have, there are ten more that are wonderful, like our latest departures Elizabeth, a very kind older lady, her husband Helmut and their son, Robert. I was the one to initially greet the group and give them the tour of the property. On our walk in from the car-park to the lodge, I could tell that Helmut, an astute-looking older gentleman, was having difficult grasping our conversation. At moments he would be right back in tune with the goings-on but then, almost immediately, seemed to look about the room with bewilderment. The next day, I saw him sitting alone on the porch of his tent. It was an extremely hot day so I brought him a glass of iced lemon water. He didn’t notice me approaching until I was about a meter away and had called his name several times. He was reading what looked like a comic book, sitting in his undies and socks. It was pretty adorable seeing him sitting there smirking at a comic and looking so content to be enjoying the shade and solitude. We chatted briefly mostly about the weather and our shared passion for the isolation of this place. He had not remembered meeting me, although this was the third time he’d introduced himself. Turns out that he was a commercial diver and his wife was studying for her thesis when they got the diagnosis six months ago that Helmut has early-onset Alzheimer’s. Robert, their son, had been living in the States for several decades, but moved back to Perth last week and this was their first vacation together in a very long time. Although it was difficult to see Helmut in his times of struggle, I’m really happy I got to meet them all. They took a real liking to Woody and I, and asked many questions about our meeting and plans for the future. Guests like them make up for the few stuck-up guests we’ve has recently.

We hired two new housekeepers this week; 19-year old rich kid, Izzy, who’s been getting on my nerves since day one, but, to my advantage, has an incredible memory which has been helping me out when my brain is on overload, and 22-year old Aussie, Anouska (Nush) who is a strong-willed firecracker that I get on pretty well with. Paul and Candice have been taking a few days off this week, leaving me to train the housekeepers while running the lodge and planning the arrivals of the upcoming guests. It’s been a major multitasking challenge, but I think I’ve done pretty well.

I haven’t had as much time to spend with Woody, which has been bothering him. Balancing work life with personal life has been the biggest challenge of all. I’ve been dedicating so much effort and time to doing well at my job, but in doing so, Woody feels like he hasn’t been getting enough attention, which he seems to need a lot of lately. He and Candice are continually fighting and they are putting me in the middle more and more often. I see both points of view, but I also see Woody trying to find things to be mad at her about instead of picking his battles and focusing on the positives. It reminds me of being back to Lorraine and Doug’s place in Wanneroo when Woody would go out of his way to poke at Doug in ways that he knew would bother Doug rather than just being flexible and agreeable. I really need them to start getting along pronto!

On one of the days when Candice and Paul were off, our dishwasher, Frenchy, got a bite between his toe from stepping on an insect of some sort. It was too dark out to get a look at what type of insect it was, but we had all guessed it was a Wolf Spider which can be seen by the dozens if you shine a spotlight on the sand at night. Their eyes glow like a bunch of little, sparkly diamonds reflecting the light. I thought they were really awesome until I learned that they’re actually fairly poisonous. Because it was nighttime and everyone was getting ready for bed, we didn’t want to just let Frenchy go to sleep if it was a spider bite. His foot was really stinging and started to look a little swollen, so we told Alex to drive him to the hospital, an hour away, just to be sure and gave them the keys to our place in Exmouth to stay over night.

The hospital didn’t do much to help. They offered to wrap up his foot, give him some drugs for the pain and then fly him to another hospital an hour away. They said it was likely just a centipede bite. Frenchy refused their service and told Alex to drive him back to camp. He was fine the next day and nothing ever came of the bite luckily. When we told Candice and Paul about it, they essentially told us we should have told him to suck it up, but I still think we made the right decision as the only actual on-site managers.

There’s so much more to write, but I could really use a drink and some laughs with the crew. Cheers!