I came into this trip thinking that I was prepared for anything that France could throw at me. I had done all of the online research and I had read all of the blogs, books, articles, and magazines about Paris that I could get my hands on. I had studied the classic study-abroad emotional rollercoaster that they all talk about; the honeymoon phase of living in a magical new land, the subsequent decline into the depths of homesickness, and the eventual settling somewhere in the middle of those two. I was prepared. However, (of course, there is always a 'however') I was not prepared for the fear that I would deal with once I arrived. Terrorist attacks, creepy men on the streets, dirty and scary metro stations, aggressive homeless people, dark sidewalks, pickpockets, militiamen with assault rifles everywhere you turn- this is what I was not (nor could have) prepared for. Paris is supposed to be Chanel and Louis Vuitton and beautiful people wearing berets with baguettes in their bicycle baskets- not a dirty old guy putting his hand on Paige's leg in the metro. Not men dealing drugs on the sidewalk by my apartment. Not Islamic terrorists stabbing American girls in train stations. I began to dwell on and anticipate these events everywhere I went- and by doing so I opened wide the door to a dark, spiritual kind of fear. The kind of fear that puts you on edge 24/7, that wakes you up with nightmares, the kind that makes you suspicious of everyone that crosses your path. This is obviously unhealthy, and I let it fester in my heart for far too long. I'm living in one of the most beautiful and romantic cities in the entire world! Yet, I'm walking around with a crippling fear and suspicion everywhere that I go. This is not how a child of God lives! Fortunately, He is not the kind of Father to let His child continue to live in such a way. A couple of weeks ago, the church hosted a guest speaker named Stéphanie Reader. She spoke on (as you can assume) fear, and dealing with fear. It was in French so I didn't understand all of it, but I did get the gist of the message - certainly enough for God to work with. Who am I to live in fear? More importantly, whose am I? I am the daughter of the Sovereign God. He has a plan for my life, and not only does He have a plan but He has a GOOD plan. Why am I allowing the devil to immobilize my time here in France with fear and anxiety? Stéphanie's message hit me square in the heart. There is no place for fear in the heart of a child of God. There is no place for fear in my life. There is no benefit to fear, and it does nothing for me. After Stéphanie spoke, the church sang "No Longer Slaves" together (in French of course) and I think that song will forever hold a special place in my heart. I am truly free, I am not a slave to fear, and I am a child of the Most High God! What can mere man do to me? I am free to enjoy, explore, and study Paris without fear or anxiety; and I can trust that God is holding me in the palm of His hand and that I am safe in Him. Je suis l'enfant de Dieu!